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Completely lost my ability to feel joy, got permanent tinnitus, got my metabolism ruined and spent my 20s being disabled from severe anxiety and OCD

Age: 26–35  ·  Duration of use: 5+ years  ·  Current status: Unable to get off
Symptoms: Akathisia, Emotional blunting, Sexual dysfunction, Insomnia, Tinnitus, Severe anxiety/panic, Anhedonia, Insulin resistance, Fatty liver, High triglycerides, Borderline blood sugar

I have been suffering from OCD and insomnia since I was 15 years old. I got prescribed sertraline at 16. I felt better for only about 1-2 months, and after that I could only feel the side effects: emotional blunting, loss of libido, anorgasmia, and later also tinnitus which never resolved.

At 18 years old when I started college and my insomnia worsened, my psychiatrist added a low dose olanzapine. This is where my body started getting destroyed. I developed fatty liver at 20 years old, insulin resistance, and gained more than 10 kg.

I managed to quit the olanzapine but I think my brain got "used to it" and I couldn't function without it long term. My anxiety was just too severe. I managed to completely quit it at my current age of 30 years old and reverse the metabolic damage with a ketogenic diet.

I'm still taking the SSRI and still have severe anhedonia. I don't know if I'll ever be able to quit. I will try. But my brain is damaged from taking it for 13 years, I just feel it.

While many people spent their 20s mostly having fun, I spent my 20s suffering from severe anhedonia and olanzapine withdrawal-induced severe anxiety and debilitating OCD rumination. I hope one day I can escape from this hell, and I wish I knew about the ketogenic diet when I was 15 years old. God bless all who suffer from similar issues. I feel your pain.

Has a prescribed medication affected your life?

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