Symptoms: Akathisia, Brain zaps, Emotional blunting, Sexual dysfunction, Cognitive impairment, Insomnia, Depersonalization/Derealization, Suicidal ideation, Tinnitus, Neuropathy, Severe anxiety/panic, Muscle/joint pain, Anhedonia, Dyskinesia, GI disturbances
I voluntarily admitted myself into a psychiatric hospital, near Kingman Arizona, after a drug-induced psychosis. I was put on antipsychotic medication. Along with, weirdly enough, other medications that I can't even name. The place was cold, just psychologically horrifying. After a week I was let out and given medications to fill at the pharmacy.
I go to the pharmacy and there is an error with my script. Not knowing the severity of withdrawal effects because I wasn't educated, I just assume that I will get it fixed when the week starts again. Welp, cue insomnia and intense sensitivity. I couldn't sleep all weekend, and I heard everything around me. I drove out into the middle of the desert to get away from the noise because I thought I might die from not being able to sleep. Luckily, I went to the pharmacy and got it sorted out. After taking the medications my symptoms subsided, and I was able to sleep, but things were never the same after the experience.
I remember the moment I felt as though I had lost self-control during it, when the medications that were suppressing my nervous system wore off. In some ways I am grateful because of the suffering I was in before was greater, or should I say that I was struggling with OCD and a little bit of chaos was needed. But it didn't end there.
After that I went through years of just uncaring pharma "care." I was on bupropion and other SNRIs and SSRIs for years, and after I quit everything, I just couldn't feel normal. I am just now recovering after 10 years of this.
I don't think I can ever trust the American healthcare system again. These industries seem to be polluted by the same malevolence that characterizes a dying civilization. Just overbearing stupid regulations that strain their people and any real ability to heal. Which would make sense because the ability to tell the truth is locked behind the bars of money and security, at least from the inside looking out.
Even as I write this, my brain just feels like it is burning.
Thankfully, when going through all of this I found Jordan Peterson and my life did not fall completely. I could write a lot about how he helped me but that is better suited for another avenue.
In summary, the healthcare system in America is broken, and after years of hard work and getting married (she helped a lot with not digging into the wound, not eating crap), things are getting better.