Symptoms: Akathisia, brain zaps, emotional blunting, cognitive impairment, insomnia, depersonalization/derealization, suicidal ideation, severe anxiety/panic, muscle/joint pain, anhedonia, GI disturbances
Before all of this, I was stable and living a full life. I was an artist and I painted often, did crafts, enjoyed my days, and felt safe and independent. I had no issue driving alone or going places by myself. I felt like myself and was able to function normally.
I was stable for years on antidepressant treatment before my medication regimen was changed. Initially, I was prescribed Cymbalta in 2017 for severe anxiety, depression, OCD, and depersonalization/derealization, and I responded well. In 2023, I was switched to Lexapro and remained stable. In 2024, Buspirone was added for additional anxiety support, and I continued functioning normally.
In October 2025, Lamictal was introduced for mood symptoms. By December 2025, after titrating up to 200mg, I developed severe adverse effects including akathisia, DPDR, intense anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and a significant worsening of my mental state. These symptoms were sudden and unlike anything I had experienced before.
At the peak of this reaction, my condition became so severe that I was placed on an involuntary psychiatric hold and admitted for three days. During that time, I was heavily sedated with lorazepam to manage the extreme agitation and distress.
Following this reaction, I discontinued Lamictal abruptly (cold turkey). This led to a severe withdrawal state, including suicidal ideation, uncontrollable crying, intense akathisia, and shooting leg pains, along with extreme emotional and physical distress.
After this, I was prescribed Latuda, which resulted in a further worsening of my condition, including increased anxiety, instability, and overall deterioration. Latuda was then discontinued.
Because I was unable to sleep at all and remained in a highly distressed state, I was then prescribed Caplyta primarily to help with sleep.
Shortly after, in February 2026, it was recommended that I switch from Lexapro to Prozac as I was still severely distressed. This change significantly worsened my condition, intensifying anxiety, stomach sickness, depression, cognitive issues, severe DPDR, and emotional instability. I was switched back to Lexapro, but my system did not return to baseline.
Since these medication changes, I have experienced ongoing depersonalization/derealization, severe anxiety, depression, cognitive impairment, blurred vision, and emotional distress. While there have been small periods of improvement, I remain significantly impaired compared to my baseline prior to these changes.
My life has changed dramatically. I can no longer bring myself to paint or engage in the creative activities I once loved. I struggle with severe agoraphobia and refuse to drive or go anywhere alone. I have been in and out of outpatient programs and have undergone extensive medical testing, including CT scans, MRIs, and EEGs, searching for answers.
Throughout this process, I sought help from multiple medical providers. However, I was repeatedly told that my symptoms were unusual, unclear, or not well understood, and no one could provide a clear explanation for what was happening. This experience highlighted, in my view, a lack of awareness and understanding of potential psychiatric medication injuries and withdrawal-related complications.
This has had a profound impact on my daily life. I no longer feel like myself, and even basic functioning can feel overwhelming. The symptoms have been persistent and, at times, debilitating.
I do not believe we are adequately informed as a society about the risks of severe adverse reactions, withdrawal effects, or the potential consequences of rapid medication changes and abrupt discontinuation. If I had been more informed, I would have approached these decisions with far greater caution.
At present, I am back on Lexapro, as I have been unable to successfully come off of it without worsening symptoms. I also take Buspirone daily and Caplyta at night to help manage my condition and allow for sleep.
I am sharing my story to raise awareness about the risks associated with psychiatric medications, particularly rapid changes, polypharmacy, and abrupt discontinuation. Patients deserve full transparency and careful, gradual treatment approaches to prevent outcomes like this.